Unwanted Reactions
I get the sense that as I talk about this "good girl" within us, I may be eliciting some unwanted, or uncomfortable reactions and feelings.
I say this (of course) because I feel it in myself. But also because I feel it out there, from you.
If you can, try this. Take a moment to get your body comfortable. Maybe close your eyes for just a second and take a deep breath. Presence yourself to what you're sitting on, and soften into it.
Then, open your eyes, and as you read the following, notice the responses in your body and mind:
"It's time to break up with your INNER GOOD GIRL. The part of you that feels the NEED to live up to an external standard of perfection, or what it means to be 'good' as a woman."
What did you notice?
Did your body tighten?
Did you start picking at your nails?
Did your heart race?
Did you lean back?
Did you feel a pit in your stomach?
Did you get sleepy?
Did you feel inspired?
Did you soften into your seat?
Did you feel tempted to click away from this email?
Did you want to argue?
Did you feel a tingle in your hips or your heart?
Did you want to defend that you don't have a 'good girl' within you?
Whatever response you had, is OKAY. It's just the way it should be.
And, it's useful information.
Now, if you felt excited, inspired, turned on - then you know what to do. Hit that SIGN UP button and join me.
But if you felt some of the other less pleasant body sensations, or mental/emotional reactions, let's talk about it.
Our nervous system, designed to keep us alive and safe, has two sides to it. The sympathetic (the go go go) and the parasympathetic (digest and rest). Now, when our nervous system is regulated and healthy, we naturally pendulate between the two. We have healthy aggression and drive, as well as deep rest and processing. We jump into some of the threat responses only in life-threatening situations (or seemingly so).
However, when our nervous system is dis-regulated, or designed around a skewed sense of safety, we jump into our threat responses instantly, often skipping the healthy swing entirely.
As you probably know, our threat states are fight and flight on the sympathetic side, and freeze on the parasympathetic.
So, if you felt yourself get sleepy, or you felt helpless in any way, that might be your system jumping into "freeze".
If you felt your body tighten up, or you wanted to defend yourself, or be critical, that might be your system in "fight".
And if you felt yourself wanting to stop reading, or to literally get up and leave, that might be your system in "flight".
Now, when this happens, to some extent, we want to listen to it, because these responses are our body's way of taking care of us. THANK YOU BODY.
And then, we want to be present and curious with those responses. Because often, if we jump into a threat response when there is no actual threat, there is something going on here.
And THIS is what we are doing in my course.
Why do we feel threatened? What causes us to react so strongly to an email or a text or a weird look?
And then, how can we embody a bigger sense of safety so that those "threats" are no longer so threatening?
As always, this is a BODY conversation, just as much (if not more) than a MIND conversation.
And because most of us operate top-down (meaning, we use our minds to tell our bodies what to do), we need to learn how to open up the passage-way to go the other direction too. We need to learn how to actually receive our body's messages and be able to work bottom-up AS WELL AS top-down.
And this is a WHOLE NEW WORLD.
A new language.
Learn it with me.
We begin March 15.
Uncover what your body is really saying, and how that affects you as a woman in the world.
And do with others looking to have this conversation.
*Sign up by March 1 (TOMORROW) and save $47!
**Sign up with a sister or a friend (or multiple) and save AN ADDITIONAL $25 each!
I hope you'll join me in this important work.
Not only for yourself, as I have no doubt it will shift your relationship with your body and how you are in the world.
But also, for your sisters, for all women, as we start to heal collectively.
I love you.
Xoxo,
Jessie