I'm triggered.

I was in the middle of a business webinar call with my mentor, when all of the sudden things started to feel really overwhelming. It was like everything in my head was really noisy, and I couldn't connect to any of the questions she was asking.

I started feeling like, "I don't know the answer to this," "how am I ever going to be a business woman if I can't do this," "who am I to be here with these incredible women."

I completed the call and took my dog for a walk and everything was still within that lens. It was like a filter had been pulled down over my eyes, and everything I looked at had this tint....this awful tint. 

If you ever noticed yourself being triggered, this is what it feels like. You know those moments where your brain just turns to fog? Or you find yourself being super critical of yourself or of others? Or you can't seem to get out of a negative thought cycle?

Most likely, this is some form of trigger. 

A trigger is anything that sets off a mechanism. So, for me the other day, it was this phone call - it started to trigger me feeling unworthy. And then once I was in it, it's almost like I entered an alternate reality. Where everything is scary. Everything is dark. Everything isn't going to work. Everyone is going to be mean. Etc. 

If you've ever seen Stranger Things, I think of a triggered state as like entering the Upside Down. This place where, everything is still there, it still exists, but for some reason it's all dark, gloomy, scary, and monsters linger in the distance. 

So the thing about getting triggered is that, it's setting off a PRE-EXISTING mechanism. Meaning, by default, we are no longer present when we are triggered. Which means, no matter what we do, if we are triggered, it WILL NOT be authentic/true/honest. 

Just like if we try to do something in the Upside Down...it just doesn't apply to the right side up. 

I think this is important because if I'm triggered into thinking I'm not good enough to be a business woman, and now that's the filter I'm seeing through, I'm going to try to "solve" my problems through the context of not being good enough. Which is going to take me down an entirely different path, than if I had been able to stay in the right side up. 

In addition, it will NEVER solve the problems in the right side up (or the real present, the place where I'm not running on a pre-existing mechanism). 

If you ever improv (dance, act, write, play music, etc), you know that, as soon as you start thinking about doing it "right" or doing it "good", anything you do is no longer authentic. It's not longer improv because it's coming from an inauthentic place of trying to BE GOOD. 

Same thing with a trigger. If it's coming from trigger, there's no way it's real. 

See, running on a trigger is like running on autopilot. And while it would be pretty difficult to NEVER do autopilot as a functioning human, it's also essential that we treat what's happening now as a present circumstance, not a past one, particularly if it's something challenging. Particularly because we often get triggered into a mechanism that we created at a young age for survival. We created it under some type of threat. So letting ourselves be ruled by a previously endangered version of ourselves, does not actually address what's happening now, and can sometimes spiral us down or away from our truth. 

So...

What DO we do?

Step one is to know when you're triggered. This is an ongoing process, but start to pick up on the moments where you go from fine, to NOT FINE in some way. Start to notice how your threat responses enter your body, and see if you can track where they came from. 

Step two is to re-presence yourself. Sometimes for me, it's as simple as telling myself I'm triggered, and I can come back. Other times it takes hours (even days) to re-enter the present. Both are okay. To re-presence yourself, you will like need some form of physical communication - whether thats meditating and feeling your sensations, doing some yoga or working out, or noticing your body in some way.

Step three is to really lock in your present self into your body. Meaning, take a moment to acknowledge yourself in the present, acknowledge that the trigger is not necessary to move forward, and feel what that feels like physically. 


The more I do this work, the more I realize how quickly and sneakily the triggers happen, for me, and for my clients. 
And I also get SO GOOD at simply dropping back to the present. And so can you. 

I have two opportunities for you to get in on this work right now. 

1. Join me in 1-on-1 coaching to actually feel what "connecting to your body" means, and be able to do it effortlessly as you navigate through your life. [Apply here.]

2. Join my Patreon community! You can subscribe just to receive the posts, or pay a little more for access to guided experiences connecting you to your body, or pay a little more for monthly 1-on-1 calls with me. 

Whatever depth you are looking to go, it's available here, and I'd love to support you, and support each other. 

In addition, I'm brainstorming some new things, so stay tuned. 

Don't hesitate to simply hit reply and ask me questions.

With love,

Xo
Jessie


*Also this photographer is SPECTACULAR. Check him out.